Parables For Wooden Ears

tweets of the past days:

Rumour has it Sam Smith will do the Bond 24 opening credits song thing yassssss #Bond24

It’s always fun seeing people you know on grindr

Wasn’t Kanye meant to have an album out this year?

“they say they never really miss you till you dead or you gone, so on that note I’m leaving after this song”

Don’t know how to feel about some Youtubers at the moment

It’s like I really like your videos, but are you so hungry for money you need to put somebody else’s music on a CD for some cash

I’M HERE TO DRAG PEOPLE’S DREAMS THROUGH THE MUD, SO I CAN FULFILL MINE

so we haven’t moved on from Nash Griers yet?

I have to work in two hours which is cool, cause I love being around people. It’s so much fun.

People will always be asking me questions and it’s like can you not

I’ve already decided to dedicate a chapter of my auto-biography to my current work place. So many feels.

It’s like is this your first time ever shopping. You’re like 30. You should know where the eggs are. And if you don’t there is a giant sign telling you.

Just waiting on life to begin

What does being a mother have to do with Kim’s picture

Wow, Please Like Me moves to ABC, instead of ABC2. Gotten over the gay thing and realised it would do better on your main channel?

Is very much down for Spiderman and the X-Men. Now waiting on a release date.

TAYLOR SWIFT ON THE COVER OF TIME FUCKING MAGAZINE

Can we all just take a second to realise that Dan was Gossip Girl. Who thought that would be a good idea?

#Five

My journey to somewhere other than where I am right now, has been going painfully slow since I returned from New York. I think some people won’t be able to grasp what Taylor is talking about on the opening track of 1989. I came back with so much desire and commitment to make dreams come true. The desire is still there but I don’t know what to do with myself at the moment. I’m not sure if I just need to find something to do that I love, or is it me being here that is driving me crazy. Maybe I can’t succeed in Melbourne.

I’ve now seen that Andy Cohen (whose twitter account is @Andy, how cool is that) is releasing a second book. I’ve never finished his first, but I must order this one online sometime, as Australian book stores have the most minimalistic range of products, and Barnes and Nobel is not a thing here. While I was on Andy Cohen’s wikipedia page, I somehow stumbled to the entry for the GE BUilding, which is getting a name change to the Comcast Building. Are they crazy. Nobody loves change. My need for Andy Cohen’s book is due to my obsession of autobiographies lately. In this last month I have brought books by Stephen Fry, Lenny Hayes, Joe Hildebrand, Amy Poehler, Grace Helbig, Hannah Hart, and Adam Boland. I thought they would inspire me. Ha. I think its done the opposite.

Sometimes I feel like I’m being to hard on myself. Other times I feel like I’m not being hard enough on myself. It’s strange how the mind works.

Reasons Why U2 Aren’t As Bad As You Think

Okay so everyone knows about how two months ago U2 dumped their album onto everyone’s phone, in an apparent violation of privacy, and on came the enormous amount of hate. Well I’m here to try and let you know they are cooler than you think.

Reason #1 – Influenced many bands you love today – You like Coldplay, The Killers, Oasis, Snow Patrol, Radiohead, Arcade Fire, Foo Fighters, Kings of Leon or 30 Seconds To Mars.? Well they have all been influenced by U2 in one way or another. Coldplay frontman Chris Martin is a massive fan, claiming U2 is the only band whose entire back catalog he knows by heart, and telling Rolling Stone that “A Sort Of Homecoming” from The Unforgettable Fire is the first song he played to his unborn baby.

Reason #2 – Product RED – Ever seen a red iPod and found it strange since Apple usually use really bright colours, when this would of been a deep red. That would of been due to it being made in partnership with Product Red. Wikipedia explains Product Red as a licensed brand that seeks to engage the private sector in raising awareness and funds to eliminate HIV/AIDS in Africa. Co-founded by U2 frontman Bono, they have partnered with Nike, Apple Inc. Starbucks, and Penguin Classics to raise funds. Earlier this year U2 released a new song during the Superbowl that could be downloaded for free over a twenty four hour period (they didn’t “force” it onto your phone, so nobody was having a major whinge). This was done in partnership with Banks of America who would donate $1 for every download to (RED). In the end $3,138,470 was donated.

Reason #3 – You know more U2 songs than you know – Most will claim to know nothing about U2, because it’s ‘old music’, but if their greatest hits were being played, a lot of young people would recognise the tunes. With Or Without You, One, Beautiful Day, I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For, Vertigo, Where The Streets Have No Names, Sweetest Thing, and City of Blinding Lights. There is eight songs, so many you will all know (and maybe even enjoy), but you will all claim to dislike the band. (more…)

The rise & fall & rise of Lady Gaga

Lady Gaga becomes a world wide pop sensation just as I begin my ascent into being pop culture obsessed teen. In fact the first issue of Rolling Stone I ever brought was Gaga’s first cover issue, were she stripped down to nothing, wearing a now famous see through bubble dress with some of the bubbles being conveniently placed. This is 2009 when Gaga would take the crown of biggest pop star in the world (if critics had any doubts after The Fame in 2008, they were proven wrong with her follow up, The Fame Monster, which yields the hit single ‘Bad Romance’). Come 2014 things couldn’t be more different. Names like Grande, Azalea, Perry, Swift, and Minaj are among the group of females dominating the music charts, and while Gaga is also dominating the charts, having just scored her second Billboard number one album in a twelve month period, she is nowhere near being apart of that group. Somewhere along the way something changed. Gaga discovered you really can have both the fame and love (the love I’m talking about here is her music), the theme of her debut album, but the fame would have to be different to the kind she got used to back in 2009.

Taylor Swift’s ‘1989’

A few of my favourite tracks on ‘1989’

.01 Welcome To New York – Taylor is so on point here in saying how inspirational New York can be. Ryan Tedder’s work on this one isn’t lost, and it’s a great introduction to what Taylor called her first “documented” pop album. To those saying that it’s no Sinatra or Jay-Z anthem, I don’t think she was ever trying to out do the greats. Also love the shout out to the LGBT community.

.03 Style – This is almost like two songs have been put together, as the first minute of the song is a snooze fest, while the chorus is one of my favourite moments of the album.

.04 Out Of The Woods – Easily the best track of the album. Got me and many other super excited for 1989. One of three tracks Taylor did with Jack Antonoff, lead guitarist of the rock band Fun, and he has helped her take her synthpop ventures to the next level.

.07 I Wish You Would – This is about Harry, right? Because when ever I listen to Taylor I automatically think it’s about a recent ex-boyfriend, but it’s not always the case. Every song on 1989 can’t be about Harry right?

.08 Bad Blood – It is well known by know that this is a dig at once friend Katy Perry, not a former boyfriend. She took things even further by including a picture of Grammy next the the song lyrics in the album booklet. For the record Grammy count is Taylor Swift 7, Katy Perry 0.

.10 How You Get The Girl – Feels like a mix of the old Taylor with the new Taylor. Nothing bad about that. More low-key than some of the other tracks, but after a few listens I came to appreciate it.

Vulture Street

I remember hearing someone saying Fleetwood Mac was the most overrated band in the world. My thought was “who gave you the right to have that opinion”. Even though I thought they were one of the best bands in the world, and still do, I realise that he did have a right to his opinion.

In this twitter age that we live in, it has become more accessible to not only put your opinion out there, but have a screen to hide behind, leading to a overly critical feel to all things pop culture.

Now although I do look into a lot of things, and yes I do tweet along to some television shows, I try to stay away from being too negative. It takes something of really bad quality to get me so dissatisfied and to put a tweet out there. Adam Sandler’s ‘Jack & Jill’ comes to mind in this instance. He is lucky I was on a plane and wasn’t able to tweet anything. In the end I won, by stopping the film thirty minutes in.

A show that everyone has been critical of lately is Saturday Night Live. Sure maybe the show hasn’t been to a standard it has been to in the past, but looking back there have been lot’s of points in the shows forty year run, when everyone was saying the magic was gone, only for the show to come back stronger than ever. Is tweeting out week after week that the current cast and crew of SNL are sucking going to help them achieve anything great? Nope, most likely will only make them feel worse about their performance, when they are already under a huge amount of stress doing a show live week after week. So maybe next time while you’re watching the show, and you’re not enjoying it, turn off the television, instead of tweeting, and then come back in two years. Because I’m sure by then, we will have some massive stars on our hand, and the praise will be flowing in for how good the show is again.

The struggles continue for Network TEN

If Hamish McLennan thinks this year has been a success for Network TEN, he is highly mistaken.

The network reported a net loss of $163.8 for the 12 months to August. While McLennan, the network’s CEO, attempted to put a positive spin on things, saying that they had improved audiences since May, I don’t see falling behind the ABC and coming in fourth place most nights since May as much to be proud of.

A key problem with TEN is their desire to be a place of event television, and while viewers do turn in for finales of Masterchef and The Bachelor, once these programs are done and dusted for the year, people are left to watch constant repeats of Modern Family, or a low rating Jamie Oliver program.

“The strategic planning and scheduling of Family Feud at 6pm has delivered strong ratings and improved audience flow into The Project, which has also grown audience in both half hours” said McLennan. While the game show has improved audience flow into The Project, I would not say that Family Feud has delivered strong ratings at all. Up against the nightly news on both Channel Seven & Nine, nobody expected the show to win the time slot, but putting it on not only TEN, but Eleven and One, didn’t help it gain any respect. The ratings for Family Feud are fine, but not great by any means. If mediocre is what they are gong for, then they are succeeding. The 6PM slot has been a problem for a while now. While they deliver their news an hour before the other two networks, it leaves a hole in the line up between the Ten Eyewitness News and The Project. Once they filled the gap with The Simpsons, which meant many viewers would switch the channel in a heart beat. While I do admit that Feud has seen a retention of audience, I don’t see it as a long term solution.

Speaking of The Project, it’s also boasted in the media release that the show had “recently posted its biggest ever audience ever”. That is true, but the feat was only accomplished with an interview from Blake and Sam from The Bachelor, after all interviews had been previously cancelled between the pair. The next night they had Sam live at the desk, which once again brought in viewers that wouldn’t normally sit through an hour of the show. At the time I joked saying I wonder how they are going to drag this out even more, and what do you know, last night we had another interview with Blake now finally confirming his relationship with third placed Louise. This got the show over the magic million mark again, something they rarely do. Can we expect weekly segments following all those involved in the relationship “drama”? I know Ten are always going to promote their own shows but there comes a time when enough is enough. (As I write this I see that tonight’s show has Sam and Lisa on, and apparently they have a “very different story” than what was told last night. That makes four shows with a focus on The Bachelor over a three week period)

“Some of TEN’s new shows have also produced timeslot growth, including Party Tricks and gold Coast Cops.”

Once again this may be true on paper, but the results of those two shows are nothing flash. While Party Tricks got the tick of approval from critics, with Asher Keddie again a stand out, it didn’t mange to hold on to a steady audience. The premier episode of the six part mini series saw 710,000 viewers tune in, a number that would of pleased those at TEN. Now half way through the series, the third episode pulled only 407,000.

The network’s other home grown drama, Wonderland, is in the same position. Last year when the show kicked of, just under a million watched to see what it was all about. Turns out nothing that special, as the show dropped in viewers week after week. The show retuned after a year off in August to air the back nine episodes of the first season, and then the show rolled seamlessly into the second season, a second season many thought they were lucky to get.

Gold Coast Cops is something new (better than a sitcom repeat?), but it’s not exactly going to be at the top of everyone’s viewing list, as many of these kinds of shows have been done and seen before. The international shows that have been fast tracked like NCIS: NEW Orleans, Scorpion, The Good Wife, Homeland, The Millers, and Madam Secretary, have not made much of an impact either.

It has already been announced that TEN will have two new shows in I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here and Shark Tank next year. While they have been hits in the overseas markets, it is going to take more than these shows to save TEN. Ratings this year have shown that viewers are losing interest in reality shows due to the excessive nature of them in Australia.

You can’t blame TEN for the lack of trying. In fact they have been trying hard to turn their situation around for the past few years. But time after time what they thought would be a hit dance or renovation show, is a complete miss. What they need to do is start from scratch, look at what their competitors aren’t doing, and be the difference in the market they once were. They need to become The Entertainment Network again.